looking at you quite often i wonder – why the wisest men were struggling so much trying to figure out the meaning of life? it’s so simple. you are the answer. giving life to you and watching you grow filled my own life with meaning and reason, as well as happiness – pure, unconditional, never-ending.
how sad and happy at the same time it is to acknowledge that 12 months have passed, and from now we will be counting years. but before we jump into celebration, let’s draw an illusionary line and give few credits to your 12th months of life.
at 11 months and 9 days you started walking, that is you crossed the living room without my help, making 10-12 steps at a time, with pitstops to continue. crawling is still your preferred way of moving around, and I hold to this baby-quality of yours with all my heart, accepting with a bittersweet feeling that soon you won’t be a baby anymore.
not distinctively, but sometimes you say something resembling ”mama”, “papa”, “hey”, “woof!” and “meow!”. you clap hands when i sing “if you’re happy and you know it”. you have a sweet sense of humor, and some things (like dogs, few cartoons, your own videos and selfies, the sound “meow!”, someone or something falling down) make you laugh uncontrollably and contagiously. you started being more finicky about food, giving me a steady headshake for a “no” when you don’t like smth or if it was enough.
your falling asleep routine has changed dramatically – you prefer long, affectionate cuddles to nursing, and I let you roll over me again and again in your clumsy attempts to hug and kiss, until you fall asleep exhausted from tenderness. you also like sleeping on top of me or any part of my body, with your favorite position being across my chest, from right to left.
in the beginning of the month I gave you the very first haircut, making back and sides shorter to keep it grow nicer on the top. it makes you look older than you are. but of course I am not objective. getting closer to your first birthday I keep on remembering this time last year when you were inside my belly. I miss you there, right under my heart!
nine months you were under my heart, but for the rest of my life you are right in the center of it – you ARE my heart, my joy, my everything.
happy first big birthday, my beautiful baby boy!
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